Woketard California
Welcome to the Woketard California ...
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I spent my early, post-college, career in California's Silicon Valley. It was an amazing place with amazing energy at an amazing time. I loved much of it ... couldn't stand some of it. But the longer we were there, the worse things became much of it was linked to political policies.
When I was in high school, California had the most envied and successful public education in the country. We envied the results they saw. By the time we left, California had "improved" all the way to 48th place!
We left in 2000 and the state has virtually fallen off a cliff in the intervening years. While I have visited since leaving, and could again, I would never choose to live there again under one-party tyranny.
A recent article in the "California Globe" titled "A Brief and Unpleasant History of Gavin Newsome's Record" highlights the, uh, lowlights.
Their very brief list of "accomplishments" include the following:
- Water rationing
- grocery unions striking
- growing homeless population
- denied housing vouchers in Los Angeles
- reparations for descendants of slaves
- $7.00-per-gallon-gas
- porn in K-12 curriculum
- COVID mandatory vaccine bills
- Single Payer health coverage
- public school teachers strikes
- energy shortage, rolling blackouts and
- crime
- Newsom’s COVID State of Emergency order from March 2020 until the end of February 2023 (only 4 weeks ago)
- Newsom’s Vaccine mandates for school children, days after opposing one for prison guards
The one shining example they left out was ... When Gavin Newsom became governor in January 2019, California had a budget surplus of $21.4 billion. As of January 2026, the state is facing a projected budget deficit of $18 billion, with total state debt estimated to be around $450 billion, including pensions.
This piece was inspired by experience and the amazing "progressive" experience in California.
Woketard California
(Parody of "Hotel California")
[Verse 1]
On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of weed smoke, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw shimmering tents
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the stench
There she stood in the doorway, with slick-backed hair so fine
And I was thinking to myself, "This could be heaven or hell in no time"
Then he lit up a podcast and he showed me the way
Voices down the corridor, I thought I heard them say...
[Chorus]
Welcome to the Woketard California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely face)
Plenty of waste at the Woketard California
Any time of year (any time of year)
You can find it here
[Verse 2]
His mind is Tiffany-twisted, he’s got the French Laundry wine
He’s got a lot of pretty, pretty aides that he calls friends
How they dance in the Capitol, sweet summer sweat
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget
So I called up the voters
"Please bring me my ballot"
He said, "We haven't had that spirit here since 1969"
And still those voices are calling from far away
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say...
[Chorus]
Welcome to the Woketard California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely face)
Livin' it up with the Woketard California
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise)
Bring your alibis
[Verse 3]
Tents on the sidewalk, needles in the sand
Fires in the mountains from his master plan
Last thing I remember, I was running for the door
Had to find the passage back to the place I was before
"Relax," said the Governor, "We are programmed to receive
You can check out any time you like
But your taxes’ll never leave!"
[Bridge/Instrumental ]
[Verse 4 (Added for extra bite)]
Mirrors on the ceiling, high-speed rail to nowhere
Billions down the drain, and the train's not even there
PPE from China, masks that never came
Exodus to Texas, but he calls it climate change
Companies are leavin', Chevron packs its bags
While he dines with donors and waves progressive flags
[Final Chorus - Fading out]
Welcome to the Woketard California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely waste)
Dying in the Woketard California
What a bad surprise (homeless paradise)
You can't escape his lies...
This is original work is produced by AK Darvinson with a combination of observation, critical thinking, insight, heart, compassion, passion, creativity, and technology. All rights are reserved. Free sharing is encouraged. Commercial use via license only.
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